On my way to the airport this morning, there was a crowd outside a house somewhere near Kayamkulam. The car had to slow down, my uncle saw some kid he knew and called him to the window and asked him what was going on. Or so I thought. When the kid replied with 'Oru pennu' A woman, I realized that he'd asked who died. Thoughts of Mada mada dane, still have a long way to go, floated around for a second.
Was she old?
No, only around twenty or twenty two.
Two nights ago thoughts were of people who are robbed of their lives and loved ones when they least expected it, of how fucking cruel accidents and heart attacks and even more accidents were. And now this.
It's not hard to see why most people are indifferent to or sceptical of the pain of the suicide victim when faced with the pain of those they leave behind. It's their life, really. And their choice whether they want to live it or not, but they've also chosen to take away the lives of anyone that gave a crap about them.
Rumors fly. She was with some guy and he left her, she got knocked up, she couldn't handle failing an exam, she was selfish. Or maybe she wasn't a bad person, maybe she was hurt and abused, maybe she was depressed. All it takes is a second to make a decision and the days following it to plan it. And that's it. You don't get a moment of regret.
It's okay love, it's never as bad as it seems, get help, be happy again. This life doesn't have to be so sad and terrible, there's a lot more to it. A million places to see and claim as memories, a million people to meet and fall in love with, a million experiences. If only someone found you sooner, if only someone has said the right thing at the right time, if only you could see what you have to live for.
It's all a gray area. Sentences float around voicing contradictory opinions. Why not hurt the people who hurt you enough to make you decide to die. What does it take to get hurt anyway, with fragile minds and hearts worn on sleeves. In a few days I'll forget and you will too. The people in this car have forgotten in the time it took me to write this.
All you need is a little bit of love. Or for someone to grab you by the waist and plant you firmly on the ground. A little too late now. When it feels like your world is slowly spiralling to an end, when you want to get rid of everything to find peace, stop for a moment. There's nothing beyond this love, no magical world where the ones who hurt you are punished and you are compensated for your sufferings. Nothing. This is it, this one life. Nothing more.
posted from Bloggeroid
A good article though I disagree with the closing statement. :-P
ReplyDeleteI disagree with Sibin. I think the closing statement sums up the article perfectly :-D
ReplyDelete